Yule

Happy Yule!

What do I have planned? I'm afraid that it's not much. This pregnancy is getting to the point where I ache all over and where I'm not aching I'm being pummeled from within or experiencing lovely Braxton Hicks contractions from the time I go to be until roughly 4 each morning. So any ritual or magick that I participate in will be the barest of the minimum. Perhaps a shared cup and a sun shaped cookie to offer the goddess and the god. As for the lunar eclipse tonight, we'll see how things go.

I wish you all a most beautiful celebration tonight.

dark days

Hormones are playing a big part in my day to day lately. Tears seem to be the norm and at least I know that they are being triggered and are not coming from out of left field because that would be bad. We're in the home stretch with the Bean and I'm not comfortable and I'm not able to focus on the things I'd like to do for Yule, and getting ready for the rest of the holidays just seems like too much work so I'm taking the pressure off.

Last year I packed one or three fun holiday related activities in each week leading up to Yule and christmas, this year we've managed one fun thing each week and this weeks was wrapped up with the hospital tour; we rode the bus home and looked at all the holiday lights on the bus route home.

I'd feel guilty about my lack of activity on this blog too, except that, again; I'm taking the pressure off. What I am doing is taking some time here and there, as things allow for it, to think forward to what I want to accomplish as the wheel of the year travels back towards longer days. I'm also considering all the things that I had put ahead of me over this last year. During the Yule ritual last year I put my intentions out for growth. Growth in my garden, growth in my creative life, growth in my spiritual path. Over all growth has been decidedly achieved, our family will grow by one in the new year. Our first garden was both a learning experience and a success. I'm looking forward to this year's planting. Over the last year I've made time to be creative more consistently and I've seen the benefits in both my personal life and in my spiritually.

So as the days become shorter, I hope to collect my thoughts about what I want for the next year.

Let it begin with each step we take

Sunday night I attended the 18th annual Vancouver Reclaiming Spiral Dance. I've gone to this public ritual on and off for the last 11 years and I always get something out of it.

The first year I went was especially powerful for me because during the meditation portion of the ritual I was able to connect to my Dad, who had passed on 12 years before. It was a very healing and cathartic experience and I look forward each year to passing through the thinning veil to connect with my beloved dead.

This year was the first time I've participated in the Spiral Dance while pregnant; with the Peanut I was out of town for the ritual and held a private ritual where I felt and welcomed her spirit into my life. I can still sometimes feel her spectral hand inside mine; a sensation that stuck with me as I traveled back through the veil after my visit to the Summerland that year. At the time I thought I was welcoming her spirit to come within the new year; little did I know she was already nestled inside and her hand was there in mine to tell that secret instead. My trip to the Summerland wasn't as specific this year as with the Peanut or my first trip. I felt the pull of more than one spirit when I stepped onto the shore and instead of a one on one or small gathering I felt enveloped in joy which was exactly what I needed.

The spiral this year was very energized and energizing; our intentions as well as the greater work of bringing healing to our earth fed into the cone and I could feel the room vibrating at the end with the energy and joy that the dance had built up.

I'll be keeping my personal work simple as usual. I'll take a moment to honour my beloved dead again on Samhain night and I'll be working some divination to see what's ahead this coming year. I like to use the time between Samhain and Yule to consider what seeds and goals I want to give birth to over the new year. One of those goals is to start incorporating a permanent altar space. How do you celebrate the new year of the Witches?

Confessions of a Pagan Soccer Mom: Giveaways

Not that I'm in any shape to wear one of them right now but Mrs B's first contest of the day is pretty snazzy:
Confessions of a Pagan Soccer Mom: Giveaway from Crazy Dog T-Shirts!: "This giveaway is from Crazy Dog T-Shirts! The winner will receive their choice of t-shirt!

Dragonfly's Laughter has some amazing Heating pads and up for grabs today are a pair of lovely earrings:
Giveaway from Dragonfly's Laughter: "This giveaway is from Dragonfly's Laughter! The winner will receive Ocean Side Earrings!

There's a lot of beautiful creepiness going on in Agony's Decay:
Giveaway from Agonys Decay's Creepy Crafts!: "This giveaway is from Agony Decay's Creepy Crafts! The winner will receive their choice of ring from the shop!

I've been contemplating getting a cute little apron, ever since the Peanut got one for her birthday two years ago!
Giveaway from Apron Frenzy!: "This giveaway is from Apron Frenzy! The winner will receive a Halloween Half Apron!

More Earrings these are simply fantastic:
Giveaway from Talog Witch!: "This giveaway is from Welsh Witch Emporium by Talog Witch! The winner will receive a pair of Samhain Earrings!

Plus the Haunted Blog Tour destination is chock full of fabulousness: I'll be joining her following
and the guest blog is worth a read

The Veil Thins

This year (and last year too); I've noticed that my dreams this have been featuring some of my beloved dead. My cousin who passed last spring has been a frequent visitor as have grand parents and others. Last year the I could feel the veil thinning too. I've been trying to keep track of what is said during these dreams and to be honest; waiting to see my Dad in one or more of them. Samhain marks my annual meeting with him in the Summerlands, I look forward to sharing that time with him under the apple trees.

In the past; before we moved into a house and were living in an apartment building the thinning of the veil didn't feel so immediate throughout the month and any contact I had with my ancestors took place at the Samhain ritual. I have to say that I prefer the gradual opening to the one night approach since it reminds me that the year is a wheel that turns progressively through out the seasons.

What about you? Do you feel the veil beginning to thin too?

Alive and Thankful

If you read my other blog you know that I've been super busy launching a new product line for one of my Etsy shops. I don't like to spend a lot of time on the Etsy stuff with this blog; mainly because this blog isn't about pushing my art. But that's what's been taking up my time lately. Well that and the whole building a whole new little person. My focus has been a little scattered lately.

But it's Mabon and I wanted to mark the day.

Last Yule I planted a few seeds for the coming year; the year that is coming closer to it's end now. Since Mabon is all about thanksgiving and the harvest, I've decided to take stock of the seeds that I planted last December; the ones that are ripening and the ones that have come to fruition.

This year we planted our first garden. We've started to reap the benefits of growing our own food and already have plans to expand, dig out more space, grow more next year.

I have put more focus on being creative; hence the new product line and a steady (for the most part) stream of projects ranging from photography to painting and glass work and also some embroidered mixed media. Of course with the Bean making an appearance the steadiness has met a few bumps. Of course it could be said that baking the Bean is another type of creative act.

As for thanksgiving I have so much to be thankful for; The Peanut and the coming Bean and the health and happiness of both (as far as I know the Bean is both). The strength of my relationship with the Husband over the last year and how close we have grown. It has not been a simple as pie year but compared to 2009 we're sailing.

As is the case with most of the Sabbats and Esbats we celebrated simply. Dinner was a simple vegetable based soup made with some of the herbs from our garden served with corn muffins. Had Gestational Diabetes not been a factor I would have added a baked apple dessert to the feast as it is next year will see one on the table. The Peanut and I went for an after dinner walk and talked about what we are thankful for; her list of thanksgiving included dinosaurs and recycling.

How has your harvest been? What did you do to observe Mabon?

TIme

it seems to get away from you during the summer. Between running to appointments and heading out to the beach these last months have drifted away with not too much to show for them except a bulging belly and a bucket full of memories. My plans for gardening, making art, going for walks in the woods, revisiting the elements and connecting with them, heading out with the Peanut for picnics at the playground have all melted away in a haze of mid day naps and aforementioned beach days and appointments.

I could feel guilty about that but I don't have a lot of energy to spare on guilt. To be honest it's been a fabulous summer and other than a few moments of wishing that I could crawl inside the refrigerator with a tall glass of lemonade and a big bowl of ice cream; I don't think I'd change how I've been spending my time.

As the days grow shorter and the air becomes cooler, I expect my focus will return. I also expect that my days will start to have a little more shape than the loosey goosiness of the summer.

The Weekend So Far

Standing in the backyard under starry sky with a hot wind tugging at my skirt.
Up into early morning, gentle warmth
Water in the garden
Blackberry walk and a lucky three leaf clover
More water in the garden and giggles
Pouring sand over her head
Shower
Catch a bus and hear a heartbeat

Sometimes all you have to do is ask

This seems to be the case with life these days. The universe just seems to be bringing those things that we are asking for into our grasp.

Take the husband for instance. For a few weeks last spring he was talking about how he wanted to get a bike. We talked about looking for used ones that wouldn't be so pricey, and other options to fit within our limited budget. Then one afternoon the neighbors across the street were cleaning out their garage. Instead of lumping all the things they wanted to get rid of out side their house they spread it out a little. With sign taped to each: a TV and box of random stuff to their right, an old fridge in front of their home, an old door in front of the house on the left and in front of our house a bike.

I just happened to glance out the window and saw the bike leaning against the tree in the front, went out to take a look and voila! bike for husband.

Now, with the Bean on the way we're talking about getting a dishwasher. When we moved to our current home we gave up the luxury of having a dishwasher and restarted the chore of filling the sink 2 times or more a day and scrubbing by hand. Not that I'm complaining but I know that when the Bean gets here washing dishes is going to be one of those things that will likely get away from me.

So, when we had my sister and her boyfriend over dinner with my niece on the weekend to welcome them to the lower mainland I casually mentioned while the dishes were being washed that we were planning on looking for a dishwasher in the fall. And then my niece turns to me and says, "you can have my portable one, we don't need it because we have a built in one in our place"

I know some people would call it luck but I prefer to look at it as becoming more aware of things and being open to opportunities. Now if only the lottery money that I've been saying would do the same thing...

have you had experiences where things just fell into place right when they were needed?

I'm digging in the dirt, Stay with me I need support

Hoo boy! I love song lyrics, and Peter Gabriel has some fantastic ones.

Staying on track, in a bit of a heat wave, while pregnant, and dealing with a Peanut, (who is processing the fact that she's going to have to make room in the center of our universe for the Bean and acting out because she has no idea where she's going to fit every thing) is taking a bit of a toll on my time.

My last few weeks have been hectic. Between Ultrasounds, meeting with a Social worker about post partum depression, meeting with the dietitians about starting to eat like a gestational diabetic complete with before and after meal finger poking and Ob Gyn appointments birthday parties and almost nightly bed changing as the Peanut processes all the new stuff going on and coming along I've been motivated to pick up only Disc World novels around bedtime instead of heavier reading.

But, but, I'm thinking about Earth as I go along, since the earth is all about fecundity and as a pregnant woman I am definitely showing off how fertile I am and embracing that it's not far from my mind at any given time. Moon Daughter was kind enough to comment on my last post with a link to a blog that is currently delving into each element in turn; and I have been reading along at the Domestic Witch with a lot enthusiasm. Her posts are so full of information and exercises that get right to the heart of the element plus a cool recipe for dirt cake that makes me wish I was able to dive in with a shovel if only the GD allowed for such brazen digestion of cookies, pudding and gummy worms.

I have picked Earth as my first element to explore and I hope to start digging and posting soon. I promise.

It's Elementary

Sometimes I have to get back to basics so that I can feel like I'm on the right track.

Every once in a while I go back and revisit things, to get a fresh look at something that I already know. I like to think of it as brushing up, kind of like taking a drawing class here and there. You get back to basics in order to head into a new creative direction or to see something that didn't take center stage before but leaps out at you now.

Revisiting the Elements is on my list of things to explore. Of course right now I'm feeling very attuned to water what with the mood swings that my over active hormones are causing; so I have a feeling that spending a week focused (or as focused as a pregnant Momma of a busy four year old can be) on the element of Water will flow fairly effortlessly. However I'm anticipating some turbulence with Air since Air has always been difficult for me to connect with.

This time around, I'm approaching the Elements from a creative point of view as a jumping point. Where would you start if you were in my shoes?

So now you know

what's put a little bump in the road I've been taking on my journey. And the bump is getting a little on the big side.

I haven't been completely idle over the last few weeks, I've been reading and learning here and there. Luckily for me, my fabulous second Mom (read Ma-in Law) has similar interests; and I like to pick up knowledge wherever I can. So when I noticed that she had a few books by James Van Praagh in her library stack I picked them up and started to do a little reading.

I often find that Pagan concepts are sometimes interchangeable with the concepts of other spiritual practices. Up to and including some Christian practices; although in the case of Christian and specifically some Catholic practices and rituals I know that this is because these religions picked up Pagan practices as a way to bring more people into their fold (the celebrations of Eostara and Easter for example.) What I found with Mr Van Praagh's books was that some of the things he does to get ready to practice his talents are interchangeable with what is standard practice for getting oneself ready for ritual; these things have just been fit into a shape that is more acceptable to someone who has been brought up within an environment that frowns upon (and sometimes even more than frowns upon depending on how open and loving a mind is) those things that fall outside of the norm.

Mr Van Praagh's background is based in Catholicism, (at one point in his youth he was training to become a priest) but when he gets ready to speak to the spirits he follows the steps of cleansing, grounding (imagining energy filling his body and spreading out beyond himself) and calling in his spiritual guides and Deity to protect himself and to bless his work thorough prayer and meditation.

When I get ready to do ritual I go through the same steps of cleansing, grounding where the earth's energy is drawn up from the core until is cascades out my fingers, toes and top of my head. I cast a circle by calling in the quarters and Deity as I cast a circle to help me with the work I wish to do. Looking at the two practices side by side they are very similar; almost interchangeable if you take out specifics regarding spirit and religion.

I suppose what I'm getting at is that once more my thoughts about Deity (whether Deity be a singular God or Goddess or a whole pantheon) and spiritual practice (whether it be Pagan or a more mainstream religious practice) are all about the same thing.

Off to the zoo

I'm hanging with my Mama this part of our trip. There's nothing like getting pampered by your Momma and spending some quality time with my sisters and the big bro and my Grandma. When I get back I'll share with you how we spilled the beans.

In the meantime I've got another scheduled post up here. We'll be back home after a big trip filled with big news, 4th birthday parties, family reunions, marshmallow roasts, mosquito bites and a trip to the zoo. It will have gone like most trips to visit family; way too fast.

I'm spending some time with the family this week.

Obviously the link that I sent you to last post was written a few weeks ago. We wanted to wait to tell our families in person before we let the world at large know what was going on.

I've got another post up at So Anyway... which goes into a little bit more about what's been going on. I hope you're having a great week and for those of you south of the border Happy Independence Day!

in case you were wondering...

a few posts ago I mentioned that I'd hit a little speed bump in my travels but I neglected to share what that speed bump was. Today I have a scheduled post up on my other blog that does the job of explaining what's been up and why I've been a little lax in my posts in favour of taking some extra care of myself.

checking in

It's been a few since my last post here. I'm still alive and well, I've just been super busy with birthday party planning, vacation plans and taking care of myself.

Since we're headed out of range of reliable Internet and by reliable I mean there's going to be Internet I just can't be relied upon to get on it when I could be visiting with my family instead.

I'll be back and posting regularly again after the 12th of June once we're back home and settled. In the meantime I've got some posts scheduled over at So Anyway... if you're feeling like you'd like a little bit to tide you over I've scheduled some posts where you can link to those posts.

At the water

after reading some of the posts from some of the other accounts of meeting at the water I'm almost afraid to say that my preparations and work was limited to my bowl of water a jar of full moon water to boost my intentions and a quiet trip into the back yard.

Like a lot of the spell work I do I tend to start out with grand plans that far outreach my means. With unlimited resources, time and space what I could come up with some amazing altars and rituals. As it is, I'm limited and make do with what I have.

While I have plans to set up a permanent altar somewhere in our home I haven't quite yet. I did not set up a working altar on Saturday. What I did was fill a bowl from my cupboard with water and took it out into our yard beneath the Cherry tree. I cast a simple circle and welcomed the elements. I welcomed the Goddess and told her my intent. To my bowl, I added the full moon rain water that I had collected from the last full moon to boost my intentions. Then I placed my hands in the water and sent out my thoughts and prayers for healing of the waters and the ocean floor.

I sat and meditated on the energies I was sending out with my hands still resting on the surface of the water in my bowl. I imagined my energies infusing the water and as I poured the water from my bowl into the earth I pictured all the other waters that had been blessed that night commingling together, the healing energy from all those sources mixed together, become stronger from the mix and our shared intentions. I opened the circle, thanked the Goddess, the elements and went in to go to sleep.

Did you meet us at the water last Saturday?

Housecleaning

As I've mentioned something has popped up that has added another element to my journey. It's caused me to take a step away from what I thought this was going to be and be about. I've put down some of the books I've been reading and re-reading and picked up other books that I've read before. For some reason these books seem more important right now and I'm going with that.

I have a busy couple of weeks ahead of me, the Peanut is turning 4 and there is a party on the radar.

We are headed back to Alberta and that means (if our last trip taught us anything that is) that posts here and at So Anyway... will be few and scattered if at all.

Tonight, once darkness has fallen, I'll be headed out to the backyard with a bowl of water and my heart full of healing intentions to meet a growing movement of people at the water.

And by the end of the weekend I hope to have sold my beloved 4x5 press camera. It's time to let it go, it's been sitting unused in it's heavy duty leather carry case for the last 4 years with very little time in the sun. It needs to be with someone who will put it to use and enjoy it.

Healing the Waters

Spell work is all about putting your intentions out there for the universe to pick up and amplify. The thing about the universe is that we are all connected to it and all those things we send out there are felt and put to work in one degree or another through that interconnectedness.

So when a group of people get together with similar intentions it ripples out into the universe a little farther and faster than if the intention was coming from a singular source. This coming Saturday is the New Moon, a time for setting the stage for change. Hanna at Divining Women has an extraordinary idea for a New Moon spell work that will send energy and healing to the waters in the Atlantic where a gaping hole in our ocean's floor is gushing toxic oil and gas into our living waters, killing and damaging so much as it continues.

Like so many others I am sickened, enraged and so much more over this avoidable tragedy. I won't put any energy into finger pointing, there are a lot of other people better equipped to do that, people with knowledge that I don't have and the capacity to put into words what I am feeling and thinking so much better than I can. I want more than anything for the damage to stop and for the waters that have been poisoned and everything that that poison is touching to be cleaned and whole again.

So I will add my energy to the healing with a spell of my own on Saturday. I will send my intentions out into the universe with everyone else who has pledged to do the same on Saturday. As I lay my hands on the waters and pour my thoughts of healing and strength into our Mother I will feel the combined energy of those who are participating and feel the wave of energy as it pours into the water headed out to where the earth needs it the most.

Join us won't you?

and just like that

another stumbling block.

This week has been a little how shall I say... I don't know how to say without getting too much into something that I'm not ready to talk about just yet but lets just say that I've have changes incoming and adjusting to them is taking away from some of the things I wanted to be writing about today instead of writing about why I'm behind. So the exercises that I mentioned in the last post are still on my to do list once I can put more focus on them. They are simple exercises and ones that I can do simply and soon once I've managed to get my equilibrium back in place or rather my footing. In the meantime I am still reading, and examining because that never stops.

All things

This post is going to sound fairly quantum (as far as I understand quantum based on certain aspects of Terry Pratchett's Disc World and other popular media that I've gleaned here and there)

This week I went back to Starhawk again, and put my focus on the idea of patterns and relationships in respect to the idea of magical workings; which if we're going to be honest, is probably what draws most people to the craft to begin with. Casting spells by the light of the full moon and candle or firelight is a romantic notion that was (and is) one that drew my attention, when I first started investigating Wicca and Paganism as a spiritual path.

Ultimately creating magic is all about sending your will, your intentions, your wishes out into the universe. It is about changing your consciousness at will. It is about seeing the world in respect to patterns of energy, of cause and effect, light and dark... Looking at the world with a heightened awareness. This way of looking at the world is one that artists often find themselves using; which sets them apart from mainstream society; and is another connection between creativity and the divine.

It's about sending what you want out into the universe so that the universe will toss it right back to you; because; with sending out the intention, you are also working towards that goal as well.

I'm not quite finished the chapter I've been reading. There are some exercises in this chapter that I want to do in addition to the exercises in another book I am reading that I feel will be a great introduction to Starhawk's activities. My next post will be about those as well as any other thoughts that come up as I finish the chapter.

Out of the mouths of babes

I wanted to write that sometimes I'm surprised at how children see the world but really what I mean is that I am amazed and in awe at how much truth they see and how they cut to the heart of the matter so elegantly. I read Any Mommy all the time. Her posts have opened my eyes to any number of hard, painful and beautiful things, also; she has the ability to make me laugh and cry in a single post.

Recently she posted a conversation she had with one of her children about what I refer to as Deity since I believe in more than one aspect of the divine and what she refers to as God. In the conversation she asked her son what he thought God was, his answer gave me chills with it's beautiful simplicity. It is the answer I would like to give to any one who ever asks me what I think Deity is. You can read it here:
Is There Any Mommy Out There?: Tell me all your thoughts on God

Talking religion and faith is a touchy subject, one that I rarely get into with people who don't know where my faith lies. In the case of talking to children about faith and religion, the subject itself is so immense it's hard to know where to start, how much to impart, what to leave alone. I come from a family that didn't really observe religion beyond Christmas and Easter and Church was never a part of those holidays for us. I want to raise my daughter to respect all aspects of the earth, her community and the divine. I'm doing this, as I do most things in baby steps, a little here and there, adding to our family practice as she grows older. We started with a night time prayer to the moon, an aspect of Deity that I feel strongly about. We've moved on to celebrating each Sabbat and Esbat in simple and fun ways. As we move onward we'll add more.

I believe, as I do with anything that has to do with parenting; that whatever is working for you and your family is the best thing for you to be doing. Taking into account the idea that no harm is being done of course.

It's all good, or not as bad as I thought it would be

My last post.
Of the things I've learned from this; that I am no longer willing to let things slide because there is calm after a storm is top of the list. Enough is enough. Storms should not be a regular part of life, life should not have to tip toe around in fear of starting a new one. We are moving forward and it's a long road ahead, but we are moving forward together and along the same road.

I've been reading some, and allowing myself some time to create a little each day. I'm coming across some glitches with my BOS pages but I will be able to clear these up with some problem solving. Once I've done that I'll share them here.

I'll post a little bit about what I've been reading in the few days and what my thoughts are about it all.

Mirror Moments

This has turned out to be so challenging; so much sooner than I thought it would happen.

When I made the choice to honour the divine, to follow my own path towards Goddess spirituality; I made it knowing that I was going to have to face things about myself and my life that would feel uncomfortable about. That I would have to face, head on, painful moments and choices. I knew going in, that I would be looking into a mirror at times and that what I would see would be the truth and that I might not like what it was I was seeing.

We live far from family, what friends I have where we live have busy family lives and see mostly what I let them see. It's a hard thing to face the humiliation of having people see that your life is not picture perfect. It's also one of those mirror moments, when you see what your life is like through the eyes of others. What I've been living with, overlooking and letting fester was put under a magnifying glass and it was uncomfortable, it was painful. Excruciating. And I fought against it right up until it was laid bare to me by the ones who love us all the most.

I took the first step towards making a major change, towards a better life for myself, for my husband and mostly and most importantly for our daughter. I took that first step and my whole body shook, my face was flushed so badly that I felt as though I had been standing with my face turned towards the desert sun for a 12 hour day, my heart was pounding. I took the first step and it was hard and the next is going to be so much harder to take because I take it alone, I take it without those people standing beside me, or behind me or in front of me, and I can't afford to let things slide anymore. Changes have to be made and I have to back up that first step, make sure that the work gets done and if not; make a decision that I don't want to make but will.

Coming out of this I will be a stronger woman. Confronting a weakness and overcoming it is a part of facing the darkness and passing through it. It's not meant to be easy, nothing worthwhile ever is.

Kitty Love

So far this trip: A lot of kitty love. Pictures to follow

The Wiccan Rede

One of the first things I learned when I began to research Goddess Religion was the Wiccan Rede. Essentially the one common law that all Wiccans follow:

An ye harm none; do as thou wilt.

I've said before that my belief is that all Deities are part of a whole. Each Goddess and God a separate aspect of that powerful energy that includes all living things, and all forces. We are one with the Goddess, one with the God, one with where we live, one with our environment, with our neighbors. It only makes sense that we should consider each of our actions and how they will affect ourselves, those around us, our Earth.

Will something as simple as which apple I buy at the market cause any harm? If so, picking up an organically grown apple; instead of the first one I pass by, or even growing my own would be that much better. If I need new clothes do I buy the super inexpensive clothes that may have been created in a sweat shop or do I purchase from a consignment store, or better yet a consignment store where the proceeds go to a worthy charity?

There are a million choices like this that need to be made each day, each hour. It kind of makes living life, just going from minute to minute a spiritual act.

Of course the easiest choices are not always those that will cause the least amount of harm. Sometimes things like cash flow or not knowing that there is another choice can get in the way.

Changing our habits towards lowering our carbon foot print can be done by making one small change and then another and another and another; following the Rede can be done the same way a single step at a time.

I've been working on a page in my Book Of Shadows for the Rede. The whole poem which contains so much information about the wheel of the year, the moon phases, the rule of three... I can't imagine a better addition early in the book.

Once it's done I'll include some images.

In other news: It's my Grandma's 91st birthday next week so we'll be off celebrating with her. My posts may be few and far between until we return, I'm taking my new book with me and my sketchbook to jot down ideas and thoughts.

Lavendar, Sage, Thyme, Rosemary and Basil

My Mother's Day weekend was full of delightful moments and quality time with the family. My husband and daughter took me to the garden center where I picked out two lovely English Lavender plants to go with my fledgling herb garden.

I've chosen herbs that I can use both for cooking and for spell crafting. I've started some of the plants from seeds and others are from seedlings that I've picked up at the garden centre and the grocery store.

Spending time in the garden is turning out to be enjoyable and an act of meditation and a practice in patience. In short a beautiful way to honour the Goddess and Mother Earth.

Witchcraft as Goddess Religion Part 2

I'm reading and re-reading and wanted to follow up on the last post. One of the side effects of doing all the reading is that I'm starting to think critically about what I'm reading and about this whole journey. Ideally a year and a day is just the beginning of the journey, the whole point is that I'm not following blindly the path that is set out but that I am creating my own road, sometimes or most of the time it will run parallel to other paths but it will be cleared by me. It's hard work but good work.

I'm not wanting to get preachy with posts based on what I've been reading. Writing down my thoughts about what is in a book is the best way for me to absorb it. Some of the ideas are new insights for me; others build upon how I think already. In the end what I'm getting from my reading of this chapter is a framework for what a Goddess religion is and how it differs from a patriarchal framework.

Thoughts on the chapter:

The inquisition: the degeneration of early Christian Asceticism (turning it's back on the world of the flesh in order to become closer to God) into misogyny. Those who were/are identified with the flesh, with sexuality (women) were/are equated with evil. Ultimately the Inquisition was a power play. A way to take away the power perceived to be held by Witches (midwives, herbalists, mothers) and put it into the hands of men. In today's world, to come out of the Broom closet is to reclaim the right for women to be as powerful as men. to accept and honour the feminine within all of us (men and women) as a part of the divine.

Like the feminist movement, the Goddess religions seek to bring equality of power. The main thing to recognize about equality of power is that giving equal power to minorities (and by minorities I include anyone who feels that they are not a part of the majority due to religious, cultural, sex, sexual orientation...) does not take power away. It's a tough one to wrap your (my) head around because most people consider power as a way to control.

The Symbolism of the Goddess is not equal to that of the symbolism of God the Father: An extension to my last thoughts, the male God rules from the outside; legitimizing male control of social institutions and over others. The God rules the world in a Patriarch. The Goddess is the world.

In Witchcraft each of s must reveal our own truth, Deity is in our own forms, whether female or male, because the Goddess has her male aspect... Religion is a matter of relinking, with the divine within and with her outer manifestations in all of the human and natural world - Starhawk The Spiral Dance.

The Goddess symbolizes the egos creativity which is the definition of the Divine Feminine

The Divine Feminine uses Goddess symbolism to describe the ego's creativity; an ever changing energy. She is inspiration, She sparks creativity. She creates fertility of both mind and spirit. The balanced harmony of all of the things that make up our world, plant/animal/people/divine is not automatic it needs to be constantly renewed which is what Craft rituals are for. The guiding principle of practicing the Craft is Honour, through realizing oneself. To love and honour yourself is to love and honour the Goddess, To love and honour our planet, the animals, our neighbors... the list could go on and on... is to love and honour the Goddess.

Witchcraft as Goddess Religion

One of my re-reads on this path is Starhawk's The Spiral Dance. I bought it when I took the Elemental Workshop that I mentioned in my last post as part of the mandatory reading material.

I love reading, it's a major part of who I am, I often have one or more books on the go at any one time. A lot of the books I read are fiction, every now and then I'll pick up something with more intellectual weight. I'll be completely honest with you though. I sometimes have difficulty absorbing the information. What I mean, is that while I am reading I get what is being discussed, I understand the material. When I am no longer reading, sometimes the information that I have just finished reading seems to melt out of my head. It's a bit frustrating and one of the reasons that I started to take notes when reading so that I could go back and read my thoughts on the text and hopefully have it stick. Sometimes this works and others not so much... often what I'm left with is the gist, which is often enough and not so rarely not enough.

The point of this post then:
I'm re-reading The Spiral Dance and these are my thoughts so far on the chapter that I've been reading today; Witchcraft as Goddess Religion. It's a chapter that speaks to the legend of witchcraft's history being careful not to erroneously call the legend historic fact which would call down the wrath of the intellectual community. It is a full legend, lush with hypothetical assumptions based on what could have been truths if there were any documentation to back them up. Happily, the thing about faith is that it doesn't rely on facts but on belief. Whether the Goddess religion is more than 35,000 years old or new to this century is not relevant, nor should it be. What is important that it makes spiritual sense to those who follow it.

Witchcraft takes it's teachings from nature and reads inspiration in the movements of the sun, moon and stars, the flight of birds, the slow growth of trees and the cycles of the seasons-Starhawk, The Spiral Dance

Ultimately; for me, the Divine springs from a universal place. The Christian God is just a different aspect of that ultimate force. Ditto for Hindu, Islam, Buddhism and any other Deity out there.

With this reading, the idea that poetry and not theology is what Witchcraft is built on is sticking in my thoughts as I consider what I've read. And it makes sense, I've called on the Elements breathing in the scent of fresh earth, blowing soap bubbles, dancing like a flame in a campfire and imaging ocean waves crashing into the sand. I've welcomed the Goddess and the God into my circle with a simple song, there is not one single way to practice a Pagan religion...

Things happen for a reason

One of the great things about going to the library or a book store is that I always end up finding something that ends up being what I need to find, as opposed to what I went there to find in the first place. I took some time yesterday and went to the book store to look for a book I've seen online that I thought would fit right in with what I am hoping to accomplish.

Heading out, I knew that there was a possibility that the book I wanted would not be in stock. It wasn't.

Instead; as is the case when you open yourself up to the universe, the right book was. It is important to me that my spirituality is combined with creativity simply because I feel closer to the divine when I am being creative. The Divine Feminine Fire by Teri Degler was sitting on the where the book I was looking for wasn't. It's all about making creativity an integral part of the creative path and learning how to connect to the divine feminine through creativity; which is, as I've mentioned before, exactly the book I needed to find.

I have always felt that the the one element that I relate to best is the water element. eight years ago I took part in a series of classes held by the local Reclaiming Tradition on the elements of magic. I went into the class feeling that the element I would feel most at home with was going to be Water. And I didn't expect that the evening would be a simple one, just one that I would feel most at home with.

I was amazed that the class that focused on Fire left such a lasting impression on me. In hindsight, this shouldn't have been so surprising to me considering that fire is associated so closely with creation and artistry. It was in fact one of the most powerful workings I have ever done.

So in honour of the marriage of creation and the Divine I worked on the cover page of the Book of Shadows that will be the focus of this journey for me.

Beltane: observance of each spoke in the wheel of the year are and have been low key in our house. I try to do one or two things that have some significance to the holiday with an eye to expanding our family rituals as time, money and the Peanut's attention span allows. This year for Beltane the Peanut and I went into the back yard and washed our faces with the morning dew (which if we are going to be honest was probably 50% rain).

We also dressed in our finest dresses, tiptoed with tinkling bells into the back yard with an offering of bread and honey for the fairies in our garden. The offering was happily accepted and now we'll be on the look out for the fey when we cloud glaze in the back yard.

Crossing the Threshold

Tonight.

Once the Peanut has drifted off to sleep and the Husband has headed out for a night of testosterone with his buddies I will bathe myself and then sit in the dark and the quiet. I will light a candle and call upon the powers of the Earth, Air, Fire and Water, I will call upon the Goddess and a circle will be cast.

I will speak to her from my heart. I will lay clear my intentions and cross over leaving my old self behind, stepping toward the new.

What to write, what to share

This journey is a deeply personal one; so figuring out what to share and how to share it is one of those things that only get more difficult the more thought I put into it.

I've put together a list of posting categories for posts in the hopes that for future reference I won't have to wade through a hodge podge of labels. Integrating spiritual practice with creative practice is high on my list of priorities on this journey, as is creating a Book of Shadows that I can physically hold in my hand once the three hundred and sixty six days are done.

On my To Do list today is to get some pages ready for that book. I'll be using some of the art paper that I have on hand in my studio space and creating multi-media pages using the pages as a starting point, substrate to thoughts, sketches, collages, photographs and whatever else I think needs to be there.

I've started to re-read some of my books in preparation for all of this. I'm a little up in the air at the moment about whether to have a dedication ceremony at the beginning of this journey or at the end or maybe I will need to do both. I suppose that will be my first post once the journey begins.

Still the stars they sparkle and shine

As I approach the gate that opens onto the path I will be walking; I'm gathering those things around me that I think I'll need on my journey. The books in my library, the few tools I've acquired over the years (tarot cards, pendulum, the apple twig from my Grandmother's tree, hand thrown chalice, my art supplies and paper) my intentions. I have selected my start date to be Beltane which is just around the corner, in a few days so I am preparing for the first step across the threshold.

I've been thinking about what I want this journey to entail and how I want it to take form. I'm a creative person and I am constantly trying to integrate that into my lifestyle as opposed to fitting it in when I have extra time. Making the choice to study for a year and a day to dedicate myself to the pagan path feels the same to me. I want to make it a part of my daily life just as I want to make being creative a part. It's all intertwined and I hope to make the weave stronger in the coming year and a day.

In keeping with these ideas I will be posting here on my progress and also keeping a journal of sorts with an eye to binding it into a Book of Shadows.

As I mentioned above I have books in my library that I have picked up here and there over the years. Some I have read and reread others I have skimmed and still others have sat collecting dust. I have my eye on a book that is specific to this process:

Wicca: A Year & a Day: 366 Days of Spiritual Practice in the Craft of the Wise by Timothy Roderick

Has anyone read this book? Did you find it useful?

And then there's you

In case you are following me from So Anyway... and even if you aren't Welcome. The blog title comes from a song that has been on constant replay in my playlist lately. The post title is from the same song. You can hear the song here.

I've been playing around with starting a second blog that I could use as a journal of my journey of a year and a day towards my dedication to the Goddess. I've mentioned in So Anyway... that my spiritual path is Pagan but although I've been a practicing Pagan for many years I have never actually taken steps towards dedication. I guess it's my penchant for being non-committal and stand-offish.

It's time that I get off the sidelines and jump in and this is where I'm going to share that ever so scary and bold diving. I'm not sure how to get started other than to devote a part of each of my days for a year and a day towards a study of the Goddess, the God; in their many forms; the elements, the Earth and her cycles and to share what I'm doing, thinking, practicing and reading here.

Are you following the same path? Where did you start? What prompted that first step?